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Heres a short note to say: We fucking hate you.
With your heels that click on the wooden floor boards everytime you take a step, your big fat asses that cause the floor underneath you to creak as if theres a whale wearing heels rather than a human being, the lady with her mullet hairstyle that she seems to think is “in”, the leader of the pack who thinks that her perm is fooling anyone into believing shes younger than 60.
To all you hags that somehow werent tortured enough during your years of schooling and thought it best to route your life to annoy the fuck out of silent exam students, perhaps your life would be less miserable if you bought a dog? A beach house? Perhaps drowned yourselves in the ocean?
1 exam down and so many to go, thank you fucking stars that we dont live in America, because if Kmart sold guns over the counter here, I’d buy the entire store – a separate gun for each of you – I’d even give you 10 minutes of “running” time.
PS. I changed the title in case this seems like a serious threat. Again, we arent in America, I tend to keep homicidal thoughts to myself.
So like, totally welcome, this just in – the hottest thing this season? CONFORMISTS!
Now listen here fuckbags – I am not some retard who wants to do what you do. Dress how you dress. Talk like you talk. In fact, I want to stay as far away from you as possible… but people like you just keep popping up everywhere.
Don’t you conformist spastics ever get tired of “being different” while you are ALL the same? Your stupid attitude and pathetic attempt at a personality only scream for love and attention.
No one, but you, thinks you’re kingshit.. so stop strutting around with a massive smile on your face (unless you really are pleased with the person you are – and in that case – you are legally insane.)
Fuck.
Could I stress the point any more – you people are repulsive, a waste of oxygen, and a disgrace to everything we strive for – you may now return to underneath the rock where you were born.
Who isn’t a fan on insanely blunt and slightly cynical gods? You dont? Well you’re just a tosser and not even your own mum likes you. Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, is Dylan Moran not the god of greatness and everything in between?
I am, as of now, taking to sticking post it notes on my forehead, or better yet, giving the oh so great middle finger response (very often), because some people just dont get it, or anything for that matter.
Blatant sarcasm… were it possible to literally drip with it, I probably could. It may be the lowest form of wit but to be honest – I really just don’t give a flying fuck.
Dear biology teacher,
Thankyou sooooo much for taking the time to write a letter filled with my inconsistencies. Also the section that noted it would be appropriate for my parents to discuss the matter with me was really appreciated – I have really turned over a new leaf based on what your wonderful and not sterile and non personal at all letter (or form.) Thankyou from the bottom of my heart; for saving my schooling career and marks due to your thoughtful form which was sent directly to my parents and also suggested I should be doing more (glorious) school work not only in school, but also out of school.
I do so hope that the appreciation of my improvement, if made, is placed solely on the form you took the time to fill in (a whole 20 or so lines.)
Further more, Thankyou to my mother. Whom felt it necessary to repeat the mark I received several times – somehow believing that after 16 years of life i simultaneously became not only blind, but also deaf. Another Thankyou for reminding me “had [my] father been reading this he would be furious” (thankyou for the emphasis on furious as well – although I am not brain dead or a moron.) I was aware of this point, however I fail to care as my father was not reading the form – nor was he in the same country at the time. Thankyou oh so freaking much for yet again making my life a pleasure to live, and continuously reminding me of the ample time consuming and life eating assignments I have to do.
Oh my, how I enjoy to be walked on.
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