Ok its been a while – However I have some very distressing news. Previously this week, I became the victim of egging. Yes, some children egged my house… I woke up the very next day to see the reminence of eggshells on my mums car. It was when I saw that tiny piece of egg shell that I cried. I broke down – right on my driveway, and asked why this happened to me.

Seriously – forget the first part, it was more like this. If the fuckers who egged my house didnt have poor aim (not to mention a poor throw) hadnt of missed my house and hit my mums car, I probably wouldnt even know someone egged my house. Apart from that it brings me comfort that these losers seemingly only threw 2 eggs… perhaps they couldnt afford more? Or maybe their aim was so shocking they missed my house/driveway/block of land completley.

Being the cop (pig/crooked/asshole – to save your accusations and insults) in training that I am, I figure there are few people who can drive and who would feel the need to throw eggs at my house (seriously – if you hate me that much… wouldn’t bricks be more useful?) Suspects = 4

Probability of it being the boy whos been threatening to “kick my teeth in” for weeks? Highly likely.

Me: seriously you are dimmer than a down sydrome affected child and i really dont think its fair when you cant defend yourself intellectually
Me: so when you get your bigggg guns out and see me… ill be waiting
Me: if you warm me up to just walk over and attempt to yell at me
Me: ill be disapointed.
Tard: nar ill yell at u then punch ur fucking head in

Gosh, sounds like a date my friend. My final question is: Do you kiss your mum with that mouth? Or do you find it hard behind bars?

[note - I dont really intend on finding out nor do I care - To set the record straight, I dont hate Doug, or Lucas, but Alex can go to hell]